I Want to Do Everything (But I’m Scared)

When I was a kid, I wanted to take on the world. I was convinced I’d be a famous author, a marine biologist, a rockstar, and possibly a secret agent. Why stop at one dream when you can collect them all like Pokémon?

Now I’m an adult and honestly, not much has changed. I still want to do everything. My hobbies are multiplying like rabbits. I’ve got paints, plants, books I’ve never finished, a camera I barely understand, and an ongoing fantasy about starting a coffee shop even though I can’t remember how to make a proper latte.

I call it being multi-passionate. My friends call it “Mary Poppins state of mind.” Tomato, tomahto.

But here’s the catch. For every new obsession, my brain throws up a “You sure about this?” sign. Then my bank account politely chimes in with “Absolutely not.” Turns out, having twelve dream jobs is hard when rent exists.

Still, I can’t help it. I want to write, paint, teach, design, bake, build, travel, and maybe learn the banjo for some reason. I want to have a million jobs. But the thought of actually trying terrifies me. What if I fail? What if I’m mediocre at all of them? What if I end up being that person who “has potential” until the end of time?

Sometimes I look at people who’ve picked one career path and stuck with it, and I think, “Wow, that must be peaceful.” Then I remember I’d probably last a week before trying to open a side business selling homemade candles shaped like ducks. On the other hand, I start a new hobby and people tell me to start a new business.

So maybe this is just who I am. Maybe my lane isn’t one straight road but a chaotic spaghetti highway of curiosity. Maybe it’s okay to collect experiences like souvenirs instead of committing to just one route forever.

I’m learning that I don’t have to do everything at once. I can pick one thing for now, chase it until it stops being fun, and then pivot. I can follow my curiosity wherever it goes, even if it leads to a garage full of half-finished projects.

Because maybe I don’t actually need a million jobs to feel alive. Maybe I just need the courage to keep trying new things and the humor to laugh at myself when my “new life plan” lasts all of four days.

If you feel like this let me know down below,

Stay Warped and Twisted,

Eve